OK, so we have more than one secret, at least that works for us…but the one that I’m sharing with you today is…
It started out because Josh sits all day at the computer. So in an effort to get him moving more we committed to walking out the door at 5 pm every day and getting exercise together. Some days we walk, some days we run, but every day we are out for about an hour on a loop near our house.
So what does this have to do with our marriage?
Our walk was started in an effort to get more exercise, but it quickly evolved into uninterrupted time that the kids were strapped into the stroller and (mostly) quiet, our phones were at home or put away, we weren’t surrounded by our to do list and house projects and we found ourselves connecting and having really great talks.
Do you remember how to do that with your husband, talk?
I joke but our conversations since kids could easily be limited to logistics of how to do life, or to do lists and schedules.
Our walk has carved out time that we both need to connect as a couple.
Now we take it one step further and I feed the kids dinner in the stroller.
You’d be surprised how much better your kids will eat when they are strapped into a stroller with nothing else to do but eat. We sometimes bring the iPad and let our oldest play a game while we walk, but for an hour, the kids are calm and my husband and I have an actual conversation every day
In addition to exercising and getting those happy endorphins, we are communicating which I think is one of the hardest things for couples to do with all of the daily distractions.
We’ve come to rely on our walk. When we get busy and miss our walk for a day or two you can feel both of our stress rise. It’s our release. We need the fresh air and the time to decompress together at the end of the day.
Our marriage secret? Walking.
But really, it’s scheduling uninterrupted time to connect and communicate.
It’s challenging each other to talk about something other than work and kids. It’s being married for 10 years and still learning new things about each other. It’s supporting each others interests and hobbies.
So, our secret. It’s not rocket science, but it works for us. Whatever you start doing, do something. Schedule time for each other every day, and start doing life together not just surviving alongside each other.