What You Can’t Control (And Why You Should Stop Trying)

Don’t stress about what you can’t control.

It sounds simple, right? But we all do it. We worry about what other people think. We replay things we can’t undo. We brace for outcomes we can’t predict. And in the process, we drain our energy, cloud our thinking, and sometimes miss the good stuff that’s actually in front of us.

I see it starting in my kids already. A friend says something mean at school. A game doesn’t go the way they hoped. Someone cuts in line and nobody does anything about it. They get frustrated, and understandably so. But it’s the same conversation every time:

“Can you control what they said or did?”
No.
“Can you control how you respond?”
Yes.
“Then that’s where your power is.”

That’s the idea I want to sink in. Not just for them, but for me too. Because even as adults, we burn out trying to fix, predict, or manage things outside our control. Someone’s opinion of us, the weather, traffic, and what someone else should have done differently.

It’s exhausting. And worse, it’s pointless.

Instead, I want to teach my kids to pause and ask: What part of this is on me?
Is it their words? Their attitude? Their actions? Great. They can work on that.
But, if it’s someone else’s mood? A random twist of fate? A delayed flight?

Let it go.

This isn’t about apathy or giving up, it’s about protecting your peace. It’s about learning where to place your effort and where to release your false sense of control.

So that’s the lesson this week. We can’t control other people. We can’t control the curveballs. But we can control our reactions, our choices, and where we put our energy.

And that’s more than enough.